Stupid Girl
by She of too Much Free Time
Summary: “I is only idiot for you” V? (in need of a rewrite)


The Ranma ½ characters belong to Rumiko Takahashi. The story plot belongs to me and about 50thousand others who have written or thought along the same lines…

"Stupid girl."

That's what I had thought when girl-type Ranma challenged me for the prize that was rightfully mine. This foolish outsider, a stranger to our ways who challenged the champion without a word of apology.

I accepted…And I lost…

And no matter what many thought, I was happy.

'I'll have to give her a head start.' I had thought. Smiling at this foreign girl who was happy with her triumph, clueless of the danger her win had brought upon her.

And I gave her a kiss of death. The others were expecting it, but the way I did it surprised them. Soft and almost kind. Kisses of death are supposed to be cold, quick and harsh, chilling those who received it.

But in this kiss I was thanking this strange red head, for giving me a chance. And apologizing to her, for the hell I would soon be placing upon her.

Then this foreign girl fled…well, the guide fled, the clueless girl was dragged along.

I didn't take immediate flight, like most in my circumstance would.

My Amazon Sisters rationalized my actions, and my lost. It had been a long day of fighting; I had been tired, pushed to my limits. And this foreign girl, completely fresh, challenged me. Of course I couldn't take flight at once. I had to rest, prepare. Fill my stomach. I was a great tracker; I would have no trouble tracking these foreign devils down. It didn't matter that I hadn't vacated the village right away in chase.

I packed lightly, but I still took more then necessary.

And I gave chase. I was free. Away from the village, the responsibility I had no want for. Free from Mousse. Free from the village girls and their cold stares. Free from those who looked up to me because of who my grandmother was, not because of who I was. Free from the walls for the village that denied that there was anything beyond. The beyond I so craved to see.

Most would wonder if I had a reason to leave the village, why I would spend it tracking down the red head.

Because my great-grandmother would know if I were not trying to fulfill my duty, and I do not want to think upon what she would do then.

The girl had been almost as tired as me when we fought. Up close I could see she was worn from travel. And suddenly entering into a fight after eating, the food would not have settled yet. My great-grandmother is wise. She would have seen this as well.

I would have no trouble convincing her that I had difficulty with the kill.

So my arrows flew a little to short. My spears a little to far off. My bonbori just not close enough to make that killing hit. And my prescience always in the open. I never showed any delicacy while 'going in for the kill', but I had never used delicacy in the village, never had to. Why would I see a need too outside? Overlooking secrecy in the hunt was my own fault. My 'youthful foolishness' probably the only thing that kept my great-grandmother from coming after me. If the hunt had continued, I wonder how long great-grandmother would have waited for me to 'get a clue'.

When the red head and the panda left China for Japan, my heart soared. For a while I thought that I might even end up beyond my great-grandmothers reach.

I was wrong.

While I kept up a slim façade of still hunting the red headed foreign girl, I wasn't truly paying attention to any of the hints. I lived in the wilderness and explored the strange towns so different from the Amazon Village.

My great-grandmother sent word.

'Child, I know being in a different country must be strange and unusual, easily distracting one of your age. But you have not forgotten you objective, now have you?'

I quickly sent a reply, and excuse that I hoped my great-grandmother could not argue with.

'Shampoo is very sorry, great-grandmother. It is more difficult to track the girl in this strange land. And with its towering buildings, it isn't easy to get turned around. I am still getting use to this land and it's strange laws, language, and disrespectful males. The trail has gone cold, but I am searching for any new leads.'

Great-grandmother gave no response.

I week latter, a good space of time I figured, I had tracked the red head down. Of course she got away. Though I wish I could have seen her face after I crushed that cabinet…

Male Ranma.

That was a surprise, a great mistake and blessing.

I was defeated by a man.

I had another reason to stay away from the Amazon Village. This shy man, who was noble and very well built. And as I soon found out, had no want to marry me.

Just as well, mo matter what I said I had no love for this man. I found out long ago that words could be easily faked in order to get the desired results. Great-grandmother taught me that well.

Male Ranma. Female Ranma. Both so similar, and both so different at the same time. After the first time, neither tried to hurt me. Even while trying to push me away, neither wanted to hurt my feelings.

That didn't work out well, now did it…

Male Ranma was female Ranma. Female Ranma was Male Ranma. My dreams that relied on these two separate beings came together and crashed.

I couldn't kill the girl who gave me an escape from my village. I couldn't kill the man I had sworn my heart too, but could never love. It would be a betrayal to them, and to myself.

Those two in one who had crushed the dream they knew nothing about. The dream that would ruin their lives so mine would be set free.

I had no right to kill them. Those two that a part of my heart belonged to. So I cried for all I had lost, and all they had. And I left.

I went back to the village because great-grandmother would come if I was no longer on the hunt.

And my great-grandmother took me to the forbidden place. The cursed springs, Jusenkyo. Where children were warned to stay away from, the demon grounds. A place only those shamed and their punishers may go.

'Spring of Drowned Cat'. My curse is Ranma's greatest fear.

Once great-grandmother felt I was sufficiently punished, she mailed me to Japan. To Tofu-sensei's practice, where I had worked before to earn living money.

There in that office, in my cursed form I watched Ranma and Akane fight. Akane was complaining about a kiss that Ranma remembered nothing of. Cruel words she used on him. Didn't give him a chance to explain. Then she said those words.

Those cold, harsh words.

'Ranma, **I hate you!!**'

'Well, I… **I don't think you're cute! At all!**'

'So now you insult me! **Coward**! And you call yourself a **man**?!'

She finished off by splashing him with cold water and booting him sky high, screaming that he should stay a women and find a real man to marry.

All because Ranma dared to try and defend himself.

She cried herself like Ranma was the one at fault, screaming once more that she hated him.

Ranma never said that he hated her.

As time passed, no matter how many times Akane hit him, told him she hated him, and put a stop to their engagement, Ramna had never done any of the same.

This girl who twisted Ranma's words against him.

This girl who blamed him for the actions of others.

Hurt him because she was so egger to find fault in him, she over looked who was truly at fault. 

This 'pervert-girl' who always assumes Ranma is screwing around with his other fiancés, no matter how many times she is proven wrong. Has she ever apologized to him for being wrong? For causing him harm because of her perverted assumptions.

This perverted girl who says one thing, and acts in another way.

She ahs more suitors that Ranma, and he never assumes the worst of her.

This girl who lets a man sleep in her bed, and then hurts Ranma when he tries to stop it.

…

So she may not know that her P-chan is really Ryoga, but I have seen Ranma drop more then enough hints. Even in my stupid act I would be able to figure it out.

"Stupid girl."

heh. Maybe I should 'accidentally' splash Ryoga with cold water while she's watching…But he'd probably find a way to hide it. That stupid man had the devils luck when it comes to that. Maybe pig-boy will stop being blinder then Mousse and see all that Ranma has done for him.

Stupd Mousse, who is too foolish to see that I have no love for him. Foolish man who has let his possessiveness blind him to that which is around him. But he isn't completely useless. There is less work for me to do around the Cat Café while he is here, which gives me more free time. And he puts a barrior between Ranma and I. Something more that keeps me from being able to capture Ranma's heart. I sometimes wonder why great-grandmother keeps him around. I thing maybe she believes the competition will intrigue Ranma. But even still, Akane would have me beat in the 'competition' area.

A lot of what I do to Ranma I base off the way Mousse acts, which I suppose is one more of his uses. The glomps (which unlike with Mousse, actually find their mark) I got from him as well. And as I said already, Ranma is build well, so it's always a pleasure for me. (And sometimes I hope for him as well…) Mousse has tried to scare off my other suitors, much like I did with Akane.

Most love potions are the idea of great-grandmother. Sometimes I think that she might think that there is an ulterior motive to my foolish actions around Ranma. Otherwise she might have never resorted to trying to entrap him. I fear one day one of great-grandmothers tricks will work. Like that time the red string of fate almost works. If Akane hadn't arrived in time…

I feared that my limited freedom would once more go down to nothing.

….

And as I stood in that chapel, a part of me I try to ignore wished that no one would interrupt. That as long as Ranma was by my side it wouldn't matter that I was imprisoned. Because he would be imprisoned as well, and together we could find some way to make it through.

A wild horse shouldn't be caged.

I learned Japanese in a month, but no one noticed that.

They notice a girl whose grasp at the language never improves. A girl who can't see her husbands frantic struggles to get away from her. The girl who is too stupid to go through doors. The girl who doesn't realize that the tricks push Ranma father away, not bring him closer.

The girl who refuses to follow the ways of the country she is in. Those rules that almost match up exactly to the Amazon Villages.

The girls whose second form is Ranma's greatest fear.

The girl who ruined any chance of getting Ranma's heart when she helped destroy his wedding to Akane.

I could have faked it. Pretended I had never heard the news, or didn't believe it. Let him get married and be disowned from my village, free to live my life. If he were marrying anyone else I would have. But not to that girl. Not to that girl who questioned Ranma's love, rather then let him know of her own.

This girl who never gave him a chance.

He deserves much better. He deserves someone who will try to understand him, for I doubt anyone will ever be able to understand every aspect of the boy-girl, Ranma.

Sometimes I think of going to Ranma and letting him know the truth behind everything I have done. Then let him pass his judgment down. I would not fight it; I would deserve whatever punishment he thought fair.

Then maybe he would forgive me. He is always too forgiving, no matter who it is. I have seen him jump to the aid of some of his greatest enemies, even when he knows not even a 'thank-you' would be given.

Sometimes I wonder if he would see that Akane would never be able to give him the trust he needs.

"Stupid girl."

Sometimes I wonder if he knew the truth, would he give me a chance? Would we be able to go off together, if not as lovers then as friends, and find a place that accepts us for ourselves and not for what they want us to be?

Sometimes I wonder what great-grandmother would do if she found out I even had these thoughts.

"Shampoo choose freedom over love."

I fear that I have gone even beyond Ranma's limits for forgiveness, and I'm not sure if I want to see if I'm right. I'm not strong enough to take that chance.

"Stupid girl."

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OOC: Shampoo is a character that fascinates me. She learned the Japanese language in such a short period of time, and then never seemed to improve. When Shampoo gave Ranma-chan the kiss of death, all the other amazons seemed surprised. Shouldn't they have seen it coming and be glad that Shampoo acted quickly in giving the threat? Shouldn't the kiss of death give the receiver some sort of chill? And I don't believe it ever showed Shampoo following them out of the village.

During the manga when she came back in cat form, somehow her reactions to Akane's words just hit me…in some way I can't explain. Then in the volume where the giant cat was trying to marry Shampoo (for the first time) the words just made me think. There have been a lot of spins on the Shampoo-not-so-stupid stories, and this is just another one that will probably be lost among all the others floating out there. But when inspiration strikes, my cat begins to attack my feet…and her teeth hurt so it's best to get it all out. Now if you excuse me, I have to find some Band-Aids.


End file.
